Monday, March 21, 2011

Ostara Forgotten

I forgot to celebrate Ostara.  In my adult life, I've never forgotten a holiday like that.  I'm in charge of setting the religious/spiritual tone for the family.  It is my job as the mother to make sure that the traditions are maintained.  I'm the force behind the special holiday meals, the decorations, the gifts, and the storytelling.  I'm the one who is supposed to make the magic happen.  I'm the Easter Bunny.  My children didn't even notice.  We give them Easter baskets with books, candy, and toys each year at this time.  Kids like that kind of thing.  I would have thought they would remind me of the upcoming holiday.  They noted the day, but only in the context of their interest in the advent of spring.  It was as if all those years of getting baskets full of Easter toys didn't leave any impression at all.  What happened?  A few weeks ago when I asked them to tell me about their spirituality, they all said they were Quakers.  When did they stop calling themselves Pagans?  I'm not sure what to think about it. 

10 comments:

Lone Star Ma said...

I also forgot. It was never as much of an event to me, but I usually noticed it and marked it. Hmmm.

Hystery said...

I'm glad I wasn't the only one! I wonder if for me it has something to do with an evolving relationship to my Paganism. I grow increasingly impatient with careless theism and hollow ritual. The kids (inexplicably) forgot the kid-oriented holiday, but they certainly didn't forget the Equinox. I got daily reports on just how many days to spring we had left on the calendar. I think I'll go with that and work more toward deepening their awareness of the natural rhythm of the year rather than focus on bells and whistles. If they love Nature without feeling any need to attach any particular deities and rituals to it, then why should I complain? In fact, hooray!

Morgaine said...

"I think I'll go with that and work more toward deepening their awareness of the natural rhythm of the year rather than focus on bells and whistles."

Hystery, you are hardly convincing me that your Paganism is on the decline. Rituals that are hollow or meaningless or not missed when absent, well, why would anyone perform them? Sorry, but I don't think your forgotten religious celebration has a darn thing to do with your Pagan Nature or practice. The shell cracks and falls away when it is no longer necessary for survival.

taio said...

frumos

Hystery said...

Your point is well made, Morgaine. My sad feelings were probably drawn from a sense of bruised feeling and personal insecurity.

It really bummed me out when my children, by forgetting the holiday, indicated that they did not care much about or recall all the work that I've put into that mommy role all these years. Hurt my feelings a bit. I also have been feeling an increasing sense of alarm about how dissimilar my Paganism is from those I've met online. What's happening with that is merely that I was isolated as a Pagan before and now I am less so. Of course I'm going to run into a larger number of people whose Paganism is offensive to me now that I have moved outside of my lovely little academic shell. The same is/was true for my Christian experience. The spirituality of the people "out there" is never as clean and palatable to me as that which I find in the books.

Now, I'm just thinking out loud here. Hmmm. I've been putting a lot of grumpy emphasis on my feelings of not fitting in with people. What I need to focus on is the fact that I've also met a good number of folks here on this blog and in my Quaker conversations who, whether they call themselves Pagans or Quakers or Unitarians or universalists, or nontheists have made me feel like a part of a community. A community of what? That seems to matter less and less to me, and I'm learning to like that.

Solitary Pagan said...

Hystery,

Academia is immeasurably valuable, but there is a difference between those who can read the directions on how to perform a painstaking operation, and those who can take that knowledge and bring it to Life.

Please, find it within yourself to grant all of us (and yourself especially) the greatest gift you can give; I'm speaking of weaving your own design on the face of our beautiful, Pagan tapestry.

And, to paraphrase a beloved one gone before us "out beyond the ideas of wrong and right" is where I'll meet you as will many others.

I know, I know. It's so cliche. **rolling eyes** ;-) Blessed be!

Morgaine

Hystery said...

For me, academics *is* practice.

Cora said...

We all practice in a different way.

Family traidtions are wonderful and they evolve over time. Perhaps your children are ready to move past the socialy deemed necessary traditions (Easter baskets and presents)by embracing their Pagan-ish roots by celebrating Nature simply.

That, to me, is my kind of Paganism...and what I raise my kids to do.

Autumn Windwalker said...

I know that for ME, Mardi Gras was the very thing that kicked my butt into gear when the Spring came. Of course, I'm in the South and spring comes earlier here than it does most other places in the US, but that's ok. There is that element of paganism, that is a celebration of place and what's going on right where you're at, at any given time. So maybe a celebration of Ostara right on March 21 isn't right for you, be it this year or whatever. Do your Spring observations when you look around at the earth and it screams SPRING at you. Don't worry about the date on the calendar. Mother Nature certainly doesn't.

Hystery said...

Autumn Windwalker,
That is such sensible and sane advice that I'm surprised at myself for failing to consider it earlier. I've really been so caught up in following tradition (even though I keep saying I have contempt for tradition!) that I failed to realize that the important thing is participation in nature. It is no wonder I've felt distant from Paganism in my life if I've let it become a dead form. It is still cold, wet, and dark here even in May. I just need to adjust my Pagan year to fit where I live. Bless you for your advice. :-)